Baby steps with some falling down

 I really have no idea how I learned to walk. Fortunately babies are close to the ground when they fall.

I do remember having many skinned knees. A strange phrase actually, because it was the scabs on my knees which were always most interesting. I would pick at them. What can I say, even when told not to, I have fingers which just go for things that itch. You wouldn't want to have seen me when measles or chicken pox happened. And don't forget I survived all kind of childhood ills without medicine thanks to Christian Science (but we did get bandaids at least.)

But for now, my baby steps are to try to move forward with the move. I keep stumbling along however!

The manager of the Durango apartment called today, and sent as attachments to an email, 8 pages of the application which needed correcting. So that took over an hour...because even though she spelled out complete directions, I kept only finishing half of them. I'd then scan the incompleted page, save it, and then notice I had to do another change on the same page, so would delete the first scan, make the second change, scan, save, etc. again. (Yes I know there's redundancy to say etc. and again.) There was lots of effort and mistakes made.

I took a nap after that. I woke after 40 minutes and thought, nope, this nap needs to go further, and it did.

Did I mention that I started to pack dusty books, while wearing a mask....but I started having strong coughs...which were not easy to clear. The nap helped a little.

Then I had another issue to deal with in thinking about moving, how to clean the apartment for the final move-out inspection. I may have chased another cleaner away with my being too particular in giving comments and instructions, so once again I don't have a regular cleaner. There is the possibility of just doing minimal cleaning and letting the management do the rest and charge it against my deposit which is due to be returned. My son and I had a phone discussion on this.

More paper work is waiting for my attention tomorrow, as well as those dusty books. I think it's time to work on the closets finally! But first I'm going to listen a while to my Anne Hillerman book and sleep some dreamless sleep. I enjoy reading about Navaho country before I move to the area.

Then another cry for joy

 At our coffee meet-up today my friends Helen and Teresa gave me a super coffee mug to remember them by.

It's covered by little photos of all the selfies we've taken while going on day trips together. I cried for joy at seeing their love displayed in all those photos, and that I'll not be going on many more day trips with them. I said "I'm not going, I want to stay here!"

Of course that was refuted immediately and I smiled and wiped my eyes.

Yes, I'll take some photos of the photo mug. It's too dark now to get good photos, the colors would be wrong.

We do have another trip planned, with Judy also invited. And we never know what Helen's situation with her sick hubby will mean. He's to have hospice care, but she can't take care of him at all at home. The hospital people should know that just looking at her. If they don't provide 24/7 care, she would be overwhelmed. 

And we're going to have another lunch at Ole's Guacamoles before I leave.

So there are still some good things happening with my friends. And I plan to go up to Mt. Mitchell next week...a bit longer drive, but the height is the goal, to be able to breathe at higher altitudes. Durango is as high as Mt. Mitchell, or just about. 

I will be happy to move wherever I can...Cortez or Durango. Both will be close to my sweet son, who went to bat for me with the batty manager yesterday. 

Letting some emotions out

Yesterday I drove with friends up along the Blue Ridge Parkway and we ate lunch sitting in our collapsible chairs at an overlook. A good easy time and I acclimated my lungs (and ears which popped a few times) to almost 6000 feet. 

 After that two hour trip I came home and decided to check in with the manager at the apartment in Durango. Yes she had received my papers, and was planning to go over them that afternoon. But she wanted us to move in in a couple of weeks, and sign the lease in person, in June! I said I couldn't afford to fly back and forth across country, and could my son sign papers (with the power of attorney form, and pay the first months rent?) Not possible, she said, it would have to be in person. No way to email them either. She could check with corporate, but she knew they wouldn't let me. And when did I think I wanted to move when my son would be available to drive me? I told her the last week of July...

She said she'd spend time going over my application and get back to me (thinking there would have to be some changes made probably.) She said if I couldn't take this apartment when it was ready, I'd go to the bottom of the waiting list.

I hung up and started crying. I haven't had any emotional release like that in months, maybe years. It just felt like nothing was happening, and I wouldn't be able to move there.

Of course it was irrational. Just being tired from the driving perhaps. And I still have the Cortez apartment waiting.

Anyway, I called my son Tai, who had a 10 minute break from whatever he was doing at the camp where he was working part time. He then called the manager, and left a message. He texted me that since he was working in Durango, he'd try to go by and talk with her when he got off.

Later he did, and was not very helpful, apparently. She called and said he was asking for special favors of them waiting for us with an empty apartment which goes against corporate rules. When he asked if he could speak to "corporate" she certainly heard that. But he did clarify with me and her that the date we have planned is the only time I can get there.

She called back (Thurs afternoon) to let me know that it will be Tues or Wed. before she hears from "corporate" about maybe having Tai sign the papers for me (she doesn't think even legal documents will allow that.) And we are asking for the apartment to stay vacant a couple of weeks more than the 30 days that she says is corporate's limit.

Anyway, I found my blood pressure had risen quite a few notches. But my oxygen was doing fine, after all this happened. I ate my frozen/microwaved pasta dinner, and watched a bit of Scarlett Fields. Then some Jeopardy. Blood pressure was down finally. Then bedtime.

I am so grateful to also have the Cortez apartment still happening...and will certainly check on it again soon. I'm sure I can have a few questions for them to make that phone call. 

As Tai so astutely said, I'm dealing with heart issues. Somehow when I said this was my fairytale to move to Durango, it really was becoming that kind of wish-fulness.

These moves are reality, not at all fantasy. I'm packing and giving away so many things I don't need to move. But I did stop and read my journal about when Tai was born in 1979. Then I packed it into a heavy box of books.

I love the mountains here, and the freedom to enjoy a few hours on the Blue Ridge Parkway. My gas was the only cost, maybe $10 since we went a bit further than I've gone before this year. And in another week I plan to make it to Mt. Mitchell, the highest mountain east of the Mississippi. I would love a picnic there. As would my friend because she really didn't like eating off her lap.

Most of the above was also what I emailed to a fellow blogger, who frequently emails me what she's doing. I really dumped a lot in that email...but it's good to let my feelings out. So here they are again!

Alternate plans

  After lots of paper shuffling, printing, (going to the store in Asheville to purchase more printer ink), filling in forms, copying forms, getting my signatures notarized, I have just sent off the final (I hope) papers to apply for the apartment in Durango CO.

And people have been asking what it looks like. So since not everyone does Google Earth (the best way to see any place at least in the US) I went scrolling around my new (to perhaps be my) neighborhood.

In case you didn't read my blogs over on When I Was 69 last week, I've been offered an apartment in Durango as of July 1, but have to send in the application asap. I can still follow all the plans I've made with my sons for moving later in July when they are available.

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First a map, please. Close to the center is a blue bubble for Famburger. The word itself is across a long white roof, which is Tamarin Square Apartments, at the corner of E 14th St and E 3rd Ave. The address is inset in the square at the bottom of the map.

Other things to note are the narrow gauge railroad which crosses the Animas River just to the north of the apartments. I've already located a nearby (walking distance) coffee shop in the other direction!

On the right you see a greyish area, with a place indicated as lookout 2. That's basically a cliff going up to the college. I will be facing the other direction (probably west) which looks out over the town to the mountains beyond.

So now I'll use Google to go around, starting with going down the hill facing the west, down 14th St. (They are so clever, streets go all east/west, avenues go all north/south.) The building to the far right is Tamarin Square.

Now I've turned toward the apartments at that corner which is E. 3rd Ave. Notice nice sidewalks everywhere!

We go down to E. 2nd Ave, and you can see the 4 story red brick apartment building over this closer building, with the high cliff covered with trees in the background.

We keep going to E. 15th St, looking west at an intersection which has a railroad crossing. This is the special tourist train to Silverton CO.

Looking to the right (east) up E 15th St, we can see the apartment building again and the trees on the cliff behind.

At E 3rd Ave, 15th St. stops, and becomes a highway number going to the north to the left. And you can only go just to E. 3rd Ave to the right. I'm pretty sure there was a signal light at that intersection when I visited last year. (These Google photos were made in 2024)  It becomes a beautiful boulevard, with trees and a grassy area in the middle, and some of the most elegant old homes in town!

So if you think I'm being a bit premature in posting these photos of the area when I haven't even been approved for an apartment, I have a plan.

I was perfectly happy with the apartment possibility in Cortez. And I haven't sent in my thanks but no thanks yet, since I want it to be my safety net at this point.  

Durango plans may or may not work out. I'm even going to continue doing the lease requirements for another year here in Black Mountain, just in case...

But I'm also aware that what you think and talk about, what energies you express out into the world, can actually attract things to you.

A friend said it's superstitious. But I think it's also making reality, or as some people say, manifesting things.

If that's all a bit whoo woo to you, OK. At some points in my life, especially considering some very way out ideas, I would agree. 

Right now I feel very blessed. I'm certainly grateful.

And until there's a definite approval, it's still a big "if." 

I can still think that I have 3 apartments now though.